The Joys of Boys
Keeping in the spirit of cute little emails I’ve been getting here’s another one that brought me a smile. I swear to god this isn’t turning into some sort of weird-o joke blog, it’s just some of these make really good blog fodder 
You find out interesting things when you have sons, like…
1. A king size water bed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 3-year old Boy’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20×20 ft. room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words “uh oh”, it’s already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10. Certain Lego’s will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old Boy.
11. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15. VCR’s do not eject “PB & J” sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.
21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
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Marti said:
on January 16, 2007 at 11:35 am
Oh my gosh - those are hilarious! Thanks for sharing!
Margaret said:
on January 16, 2007 at 3:27 pm
Thank you for sharing. I’ll have to keep those in mind. I have lots of nephews.
stephanie said:
on January 16, 2007 at 4:30 pm
Too cute.
The Chad said:
on January 16, 2007 at 7:12 pm
Brake Fluid and Clorox? Gonna have to try that….
shannah said:
on January 17, 2007 at 8:20 am
ROFLMFAO…..oh good grief…my 4yo hasnt tried em all but we’re close! Good one!
Tara V. said:
on January 17, 2007 at 7:17 pm
#7…been there and done that already with a 17 month old!
Jewelz said:
on January 20, 2007 at 8:55 pm
I got a few for ya since I have 3 sons.
Shoelaces tied together with one end tied to the face will hold a 3 year old out the second story window lowered down to see what moms making for supper, imagin my surprise when I looked out the window and bobbys hanging there waving at me.
A turtle that is fed a blue crayon will shit blue.
A hampster gets dizzy when tied to a sit and spin and spun around.
the wire from a sparkler will throw the braker in a bathroom when inserted into the outlet. also throws 4 year old into bath tub. Thank you Big brother
Dad gets very mad when sons feed the dog with steaks that are out for supper. All 5 steaks
Guine pigs don’t like being painted brown with house paint. They don’t like getting the paint washed off either.
I really don’t know how I survived. I just thank god they grew up some.
Hugs, Jewelz
Jewelz said:
on January 20, 2007 at 8:56 pm
oops that should say fan not face
Rikki said:
on January 22, 2007 at 7:01 am
I have not laughed so much for years - It hurt so much I had to stop three times to recover before going back for more - Excellent post.
Jessie9600 said:
on January 21, 2008 at 2:27 am
THIS IS SO FUNNY!!! I have a baby brother, and I hope that when he grows up some more and turns 3 none of this will happen….of course, it probably will no matter what happens.
Justin said:
on April 25, 2008 at 7:13 pm
Awww, all those things that sound so bad makes me love them more.
sheyane said:
on May 9, 2008 at 4:39 pm
omg that was super funny!