Not. Funny. Really.

Y’all I’ve got a rant. It’s not so much a full blown rant but more of a mini-pet peeve that’s been gathering steam. As many of you know I turned 21 at the beginning of August. Since then when I’ve gone out to buy alcohol, go to the casino or get into a bar I’m running into a whole new breed of people. People who think they are not only funny but also are deluded into thinking that they are the most original jokesters out there.

Allow me to illustrate:

I went up to a casino in Payson this weekend, not to gamble but to take in their delicious $2.99 Sunday breakfast special. The ID Checker Lady saw those automatic sliding doors whoosh open and as I stepped through she knocked over old ladies and pushed aside pregnant mothers just to get to me.

“Miss I’ll need to see some ID” she says as condescendingly as possible in her breathless state. Meanwhile, folks try to help up a blue haired old lady whose bucket of tokens were knocked to the floor in the mayhem.

“Sure thing Ma’am.” I whip out my nifty shiny license knowing I was steps away from sizzling bacon and fluffy eggs of goodness.

ID Checker Lady inspects it in minute detail running her bony finger down each line making sure it’s the real deal.

Her finger stops at the Date of Birth line and her face contorts into a scowl. I can hear her subtracting years and months in her head. Much to her chagrin she finds she is unable to “bust me” and looks up.

Then it happens.

The line I’ve heard from gas station cashiers and cocktail waitresses the world over, always said in a hokey-jokey voice that’s meant to be funny.

“Ah, you just barrrrrely made it!”

Then she looks up at me with those expectant eyes, waiting for my reaction to her mind-blowing wit.

Some days I’ll humor the person and giggle while nodding my head like a ditzy moron as if their words were the funniest thing I’d ever had land in my ears. That particular day this pathetic attempt at humor I’ve heard a billion times before just made me realize the time between me and my eating of scrambled eggs has just been extended. And that makes me an unhappy camper.

I give ID Checker Lady a blank look, take my ID and walk away.

Sometimes people just aren’t worth the effort…

This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 4th, 2006 at 4:00 am and is filed under Stupid People. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

15 Comments »

Bethy said:

on October 4, 2006 at 4:59 am

Oh to only be carded again. Being that you look young because you are very, I can see you being carded but for her to be rude about it. HA! on her! She wanted so bad to bust someone that morning Bug and you ruined it. Shame on you.

Oh to walk into a bar or anywhere for that matter and for someone to actually ID me would be a grand day. Been a few years. Guess I’ll just keep washing those greys out in hope.
Lindsey said:

on October 4, 2006 at 5:40 am

This happened to me alllllllllllllll the time!!! It took until my 22nd birthday this summer for people to stop doing it. As if the age being set at 21 wasn’t stupid to begin with, now you’re gonna assume that a I haven’t reached my age legitimately? Grrr, some thing burn me . . .
t2ed said:

on October 4, 2006 at 7:31 am

I like to laugh hilariously as if it’s the first time I’ve ever heard their lame joke.
Marti said:

on October 4, 2006 at 8:37 am

Hi! Amy sent me!

Cute post! Wait untill they start asking you for your AARP card - LOL!

Belated happy birthday wishes to you!
DutchBitch said:

on October 4, 2006 at 9:08 am

I think the blank look was the BEST you could have done! She´s lucky you´re still referring to her as a `Lady`. Not sure I would have, LOL

Thanks for renting to me!
Dawn (webmiztris) said:

on October 4, 2006 at 9:34 am

hell, i’m 30 and i still have to deal with that shit! and it sure gets old, let me tell ya!
ANO said:

on October 4, 2006 at 10:41 am

That happened the day I turned 21. I went to a sporting event and got my 1st legal beer and the cashier or whatever was like “You just made it!” Would they say something to someone who 40 along the lines of “whoa! way past the legal age!”

Of course not.
Tor said:

on October 4, 2006 at 12:28 pm

Hi, I tried to send a trackback ping but your trackback doesn’t seem to be working right. Here’s my take on ID:

http://torsrants.blogspot.com/2006/10/know-your-customer.html
Dodie said:

on October 4, 2006 at 2:18 pm

Stupid people and poor little old ladies…lol

We know you’re old enough hun
Mr. Fabulous said:

on October 4, 2006 at 2:23 pm

People suck. Obviously I don’t get carded anymore LOL but everytime I hear something like “Working hard or hardly working?” Or the clever wags who will tell you in late December “See you next hear” I want to maim someone.
The Chad said:

on October 4, 2006 at 5:58 pm

I barely even get carded any more, but for some reason when I’m out with a particular friend who absolutely looks older than me, he gets carded and I dont. WTF?
Kentucky Girl said:

on October 5, 2006 at 5:07 am

I refuse to deal with stupid people anymore. I simply refuse. I look at them with a blank look on my face and wait for them to “get it” that I think they’re stupid.
Lisa said:

on October 5, 2006 at 5:24 am

Ah, I remember those days. I didn’t stopped getting carded for ciggs until I was 36. Good for you…keep annoying all of them. It’s really a lot of fun to be all like, “I told you so!”
Danger said:

on October 5, 2006 at 12:27 pm

LOL I used to get carded for Superdad’s cigarettes when I was with him… like he came in to buy them for me. I always made it VERY clear that I was older than him, and I thought it was ridiculous that they didn’t card HIM for HIS cigarettes that HE was holding… but *I* would get carded for his cigarettes and I didn’t even smoke. Dumbasses. Sometimes I think some people have such shitty lives they just wanna find someone to take it out on. Sorry it had to be you that day. Ugh. I wanna say it will get better, but I doubt it will You look really young chica… just relish in the thought that when yer 50 people might still be carding you… and then you will be appreciative
LaDonna said:

on October 8, 2006 at 9:19 am

I’m so amazed at people who say really lame and inappropriate things to complete strangers. It used to happen to me as a pizza driver all the time.

I hope the little old lady was ok.