Do you use an actual letter opener or one of your fingers to open envelopes?
Just wonderin’…

Congrats IP 213.33.239.9 you’re the first person to ever be BANNED from AIS
Too bad you can’t read this and post a million irrelevant links in the comments eh?

Fuckin’ spammers.

Blech yesterday was just one of those days…one of those Mondays. You know, where you have a huge ass list of things written in your day runner that MUST be done that day. Then a bazillion other things come up making sure there’s not a chance in hell that everything you had scheduled will be even close to done. G’head say it– “Someone has a case of the Mondays.” *chuckle* I love Office Space.

Anyway, I had my battle with MVD yesterday. And I won. Yay me. I can still drive and my license is not going to get suspended. They still suck though, so keep sending in those entries…I’ve had quite a few that had me rofl–literally. Good stuff.

I’m off to drink a large quantity of liquor and try to get something accomplished with this pile of papers on my desk. Hasta!

Remember when I told y’all that “MVD suX teh Biggun”? Big newsflash:

They still do.

Yesterday I went down to Sierra Vista to pick up my mail and surprise surprise there was a letter from none other than the Motor Vehicle Division of Arizona. It’s turned into a weekly game, I check my mail, they send me letters. Fun eh?

Anywhoot, this week’s letter was special. This letter informed me that my drivers license, vehicle registration and all driving privileges are being suspended for one year starting on March 10th. According to them I never sent them proof that my car was insured at the time it was in that lovely accident back in August. You know the one….my car got stolen and the thief hit someone while he was drunk. Side lesson kiddies: If your car gets stolen in AZ and the theif wrecks it you’re going to go through hell. Buy a bike now and save yourself the trouble.

I know for a fact I faxed every single page to them. I have the transmittal report showing it went through. Hell, I even talked to one of their Reps on the phone last week to check and make sure everything was A-OK with my shit. And the Rep assured me it was; that my shit was fine and nothing further was going to happen with this.

Monday is gonna suck for whoever picks up the phone. After informing them that I have notified my lawyer of this situation I’m going to give them two choices. One– fix my shit on the phone and fax me a letter releasing me of any and all repercussions while we are on the phone. Or two– I’ll be at their Phoenix central office on Wednesday with my lawyer in tow to serve one hell of a civil suit on them.

The good news? My animosity towards the MVD breeds generosity towards others.

Here’s the deal I have for you fine readers:

I want y’all to get creative. Obviously MVD stands for Motor Vehicle Division. If you can come up with a more insulting…uh “fitting” definition using those three letters in that order (i.e. Mostly Vile Dumbasses) the one I like the most is gonna get a little something.

The Nitty Gritty
-Contest Runs till Saturday March 18th at Midnight MST .
-Prize: $25.00 Amazon.com Gift Certificate.
-Each person can submit up to three (3) definitions.
-Email your entries to bug AT thelastcowgirls DOT com.
-I’ll look over them and announce the winner on Monday March 20th.
-I’ll email the winner to get their info to send the gift certificate on March 20th.

If I get stuck behind one more fucking RV doing 45mph in the left lane on I-10 this week I’m going to go postal. I know it’s called a recreational vehicle for a reason but christ almighty people– would it kill you to “recreate” in the right lane so I can get to where I’m trying to go on time?

Thursday Thirteen was not brought to you today courtesy of the letters R and V and the number 45

March 9-13 The Hotness and I are going to Florida to visit more of his family. I’ll also be meeting his mom and dad for the first time, slightly nervous about that. When we return on the 14th we’ll both be quitting our only vice…smoking. I asked The Hotness if we could wait till after Florida to quit because I need to be able to puff away in case his mom hates me *chuckle*

I’m hoping to have gotten over the mondo-bitch stage (can you tell I’ve done this before?) of withdrawals by the time we go to the Ren. Festival with the AZ Bloggers. I don’t want my fellow bloggers thinking I’m some skinny-assed hell demon with a ‘tude problem larger than Texas

In other news, I took the plunge and submitted this ol’ blog for review over at ITalk2Much. A little nervous about this as well because those bitches (and I say that with the utmost respect) are a tough crowd to please! So, for the love of all things holy and good in this world please cross your fingers for me that my public lashing isn’t horrible as some I’ve seen get carried out there! Seriously though- as rough as they are, they do give good pointers on how to clean up your shit. If you have a sense of humor and want the real truth about your blog go on over and submit your site. But if they rip you a new one don’t come crying to me…just fix your problems and move on

Ok, so now I’m nervous about two things. This shit needs to stop. Let’s talk about something else eh?

Random Factoid: A giraffe has the same number of bones in its neck as a human.

Quick Update on Reader Feedback:
-The About page is finally done! It’s not fan-tab-ulous by any stretch but damnit I like to keep shit simple.

-After much searching I was unable to find any pictures of John Rzeznik nekkid. However, I don’t like to give up very easily. So, darling Danger, after a little creative thinking I managed to get you this:
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