Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.

In high school my best friend –who we shall call Tracie for all intensive purposes– had an eating disorder. She suffered from Anorexia Nervosa. More commonly known as just ‘Anorexia’. At first it wasn’t apparent that she had a problem but over time her weight loss became quite alarming. It got to the point where her parents didn’t know what else to do, they couldn’t afford therapy or rehab and the school counselors didn’t offer much help, just random pamphlets and stupid “meal diaries” that she was supposed to fill out.

Every day at lunch she and I got into yelling matches because I wanted her to eat and she didn’t want to. Some days I’d win and she’d choke down a couple bites–bitching the whole time. Other days I’d loose and she’d sit there in the passenger seat with a satisfied grin on her face–she escaped the dreaded meal once more.

It was a very rough time. Many days she couldn’t walk in a straight line–her body disoriented from lack of nutrition. I tried to reason with her but she was convinced she was fat. Her disorder almost killed her. I was so incredibly hurt inside for her and her family. I cried like a baby because my best friend was killing herself slowly before my very eyes. The good news is, after almost a year of serious knock down drag out fighting she realized everyone loved her for who she was not what she looked like and slowly she started to heal.

Understandably this disorder holds a bit of a sore spot in my heart as I’ve seen it in action and how it totally destroys a person. Which brings me to the part where eating disorders have made a full-scale leap into my own life.

While I was in Colorado on vacation over Christmas The Hotness’s sister-in-law made quite a few cracks about my weight. She “jested” quite often through the visit that I probably purged after I ate anything and that explains why I’m so thin. At first I chuckled along with her and everyone else because yeah–I am pretty skinny. But after awhile it got kinda annoying having her watch me eat. Or if I went to the bathroom to take a piss–have some random “purging” reference made about me loud enough so that the other 11 people in the house could hear. But, as a guest in their house and a polite *chuckle* member of society I held my peace and went home none the worse for wear but slightly peeved.

This past Saturday The Hotness and I went to a little family BBQ thing at my uncle’s house. My great aunt and uncle from the Midwest came out to visit and since they don’t come out that often everyone thought it would be a nice idea to have a get-together. I don’t really know the two that well, this was more for the “adults” of the family but it’s an excuse to hang out with my cousins and my gram so I was up for it. I had a nice day and The Hotness and I took off early because we had plans for later on in the evening.

The next day I went over to my grandma’s house to drop off some things for my mother and take her out to lunch. While there, grandma informed me that she overheard my great aunt telling her daughter that I looked “like she has an eating disorder…very anorexic-looking you know”. Nice eh? But hey, no reason to stir the shit. There’s enough drama in our family as it is.

But to put the icing on the cake– at lunch with my mother that day she leans across the table and says to me “Bug, are you working out?” I of course say no. And she says…get this…. “Well you’re starting to look a little soft hun, your arms are getting un-toned. You need to start working out again; you’re too young to get out of shape now. In high school you were always so…well…toned. And you really need to start eating right too.”

*cricket cricket*

Later that day when I related this all to The Hotness I told him:

“Ya know, I don’t have to worry about being negatively effected about my self image via the media. The women in my life are all I need apparently.” *chuckle*

I’m skinny; I’m not living under the illusion that I’m fat. I know I’m 5′6 1/2″ and weigh a whopping 125lbs. I eat about 6-7 times a day (ask The Hotness). I don’t exercise at all. I smoke like a chimney. I sit at a computer 12+ hours each day. And I live by the motto “I’ma die eventually I may as well enjoy my life.” It’s not like I’m trying to be skinny…I just AM. But it’s irritating because I don’t talk to these people and crack fat jokes about them to their faces, in fact I never mention weight as a rule– apparently I was raised right. People’s lack of respect sometimes just sends my blood pressure through the roof.

So, to my readers…if it is blatantly apparent to you after careful observation that someone DOES in fact have an eating disorder please by all means help them in a non-insulting manner. But just because someone is rail thin please be careful of your words to them and go easy on the jokes. Ya never know just what that person has been through and it may just strike a raw nerve even if they are smiling along with you. Allrighty, with that said I’m gonna go hork down on some dinner g’night y’all

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006 at 9:16 pm and is filed under Stupid People. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.