Some People Never Cease To Amaze Me

A couple days ago I received an email from a person who apparently monitors my blog quite often. This person (who happens to be a total stranger) decided it was their god-given right to “call me out on the carpet”…so to speak. They wanted to know why I had gotten over the whole me n’ Josh thing so quickly. And how I could have possibly loved this guy when I’ve got a boyfriend so soon after our relationships demise. I should not have even bothered replying, however, I wanted to make this public in case any other asshat decided they had a problem with how I roll…

First and foremost, you prying sonofabitch, I have not “gotten over the whole me n’ Josh thing so quickly”. There are nights when I cry myself to sleep. There are nights when I sit up in bed and wonder what the fuck went wrong. There are nights when I can’t even breath because it hurts to even think about it. Sometimes I feel so god damned sorry for myself I question why I’m even here pushing on.

You do me a favor, climb into my 20 year old shoes and stay awhile. At 20 did you go though all I have? Hell. No. And therefore you have absolutely no room to even open your mouth. I spent years with Josh, and let me inform you now that they weren’t all peaches and cream. But you wouldn’t know that because SUPRISE muthafucker, you aren’t here and sure as hell weren’t there. Like the time he went ape-shit and destroyed every piece of furniture in our room. Or the time he got so drunk that he threw me down on the bed and was screaming so loud that the windows rattled and Sebastien was scared he was going to kill me. Or here’s a winner…the time he got plastered and tore apart a bar. Heck, here’s one you got to read about…HIM wrecking my fucking car!

I didn’t think it would be a nice gesture to spew my huge relationship problems to the world. More importantly, to strangers like you. I have this blog to keep me happy and to try and bring a chuckle or two to the folks who visit me. I didn’t realize it was the place I should give the internet updates on how shitty I’ve been feeling for the last few years or what kind of problems Josh and I had.

Secondly, you ask how I could have loved him but gotten a boyfriend shortly after we split? Dare I say it again? You are a prying sonofabitch. I loved him, more than you could possibly comprehend…why the fuck do you think I stayed with him as long as I did? I fully planned on growing old with him. In fact, despite all that’s happened a little part of me still loves him. But that doesn’t mean that I’m going to subject myself to the negative that comes attached to him. You can love someone and *gasp* not be with them. Take notes bitch…there’s wisdom in my words.

As to me getting a boyfriend “so soon”; I wasn’t out whoring the streets looking for a boyfriend. I wasn’t intentionally trying to find someone new. It just happened. Rich happens to be a funny, caring, independent, non-temperamental, non-alcoholic person. He made the move, and at that time in my life I felt comfortable starting over with someone new. Any cocksucker who has a problem with it can bite me. Mmmkay?

What I do with my life is honestly no consequence to you whatsoever. You are not paying my bills. You are not me. In conclusion, fuck off and find a new hobby, because you’ve been deleted from my inbox, outbox and my mind.

—-End Transmission—-
Ok folks, back to our irregularly scheduled programming :o)

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 8th, 2005 at 6:15 pm and is filed under Pissy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.